Hello love!

A rant! A rant!

I can feel it coming!

The thing is (and it really is) that I don't understand why people get so offended when I - very politely, I reckon - ask them not to call me sweetheart.

Or, in fact, any of the following:

Sweetheart, sweetness, darlin', cutie, babe, honey/hun, doll, chick, love, duckie, pet, or anything similar.

I find it rude.

Most people seem to think it's absolutely insane to find it rude. I explain, nicely, that I prefer my name, and they invariably get all in a huffy and stamp their hooves and demand that I inform them as to what they SHOULD call me. On discovering that I genuinely am quite fine with being called my actual name, they seem to want to pummel me with punishing blows.

But why don't I like it?? they shriek.

Well, I think addressing somebody by a diminutive word is is a way of making the other person smaller than you. It shows that you feel comfortable reducing somebody to something sweet and childish; it shrinks somebody to a non-threatening entity. It is a form of belittlement, in the true sense of the word, and I think most women don't mind it - or don't sense anything wrong with it - simply because it's part of their surroundings.

I have entered into relatively huge arguments over it, which almost inevitably further exposes the very things I dislike about the whole silly situation.

Guy: "Hey sweetheart, how are ya?"

Me: "I'm good! I prefer being called [my name], by the way."

Guy: "OK, sweetheart! Hahaha!"

Me: "Ha. Seriously, [my name]'s fine - I just don't really enjoy being called stuff like sweetheart."

Guy: "Well, sorry, it just comes naturally! I call all girls sweetheart. I'm a-thinkin' you're gonna have to get used to it, honey!"

Me: "...I'm not all girls. I really prefer my name."

Guy: "OTHER girls don't seem to mind it. Like I said, sweetheart just comes natural when I'm talking to a beautiful woman! I just can't help it, darl'!"

Me: "Well, it comes naturally to me to call all guys I meet 'dickhead,' so you won't mind if I refer to you as Dickhead from now on, right? I just can't help it."

Guy: "OK, I'm sorry, but you are fucked up. I'm not saying anything out of the ordinary. What the fuck is your problem?"

Me: "It seems quite belitting."

Guy: "What EVER, sweetheart! Oops!"

Yeah, awesome.

Of course, occasionally it is just genuine intimate affection, and so I do have people in my life who I absolutely don't mind it from. They consist of my mum. But, generally speaking, it turns my paws into claws. ESPECIALLY when it's from people I barely know.

I may be in the minority here, but I can't help the feeling that being addressed by my name or a relevant nickname is much more pleasant than somebody putting me down, no matter how subconsciously they're doing it.